Five tips for the new single mum to get through Mother’s Day.
For many of us single mums, Mother’s Day can be a harder day than most. Particularly if you have come from a situation where you were previously pampered and spoilt on Mother’s Day by your partner at the time, or if it’s your first Mother’s Day as a single mum. It can be a reminder as to what has been lost.
If you’re feeling vulnerable this Mother’s Day, here are some tips to ease the struggle.
1. Avoid social media.
Everybody will be sharing their family happy snaps on Mother’s Day, so if you’re feeling a bit emotional or are a new single mum, you probably don’t need to see this. In addition to that, there will be numerous posts along the lines of I’m the luckiest mum in the world, look what I got today! Shucks. Best husband EVER. Again, probably not what you want thrown in your face if you’re feeling on edge today. Also remember that, in general, people only share their most positive sides on social media, and best aspects of their life. So you’re not going to read anything like Disappointed AGAIN. Had a huge fight with the hubby, Mother’s Day RUINED. But sadly, there will be a lot of partnered up mums that do feel like this. So know that not everything on social media is as it seems.
2. Let go of the idea of what Mother’s Day is in your head.
Let’s remember what Mother’s Day is about ladies. It’s about celebrating and honouring motherhood and the influence of mother’s in our life and in society. And that also means celebrating and honouring ourselves. Think about all that you’re doing in your children’s lives. How much they love you. How much you are their absolute world. How much they would be lost without you. You are a carer, nurse, cook, driver, psychologist, cleaner, bag carrier, organiser, event planner, maid and the list goes on… Often you are the father too.
I love Mother’s Day, because I get to celebrate being a mum, and how lucky I am. How lucky I am that my beautiful daughter chose me to be her mummy. How lucky I am that my daughter is happy and healthy. How lucky I am for the close bond my daughter and I share. How lucky I am that I am the one that gets to tuck her into bed and kiss her goodnight. How lucky I am that I get to hear her infectious giggle and hear her funny remarks. How lucky I am that my daughter is growing up to be such a well-rounded little girl, and I did that. ME.
3. Make plans with some other single mums.
You will fall into one of two categories if you are a single mum on Mother’s Day; you will either have your kids on the day, or you won’t. If you don’t have your kids, you have achieved the dream of what all mothers really want on Mother’s Day – some time out, and me-time. Or you can meet another single mum who is child free on Mother’s Day and go and celebrate how amazing you both are with a lovely lunch. If you do have your kids, it’s the perfect opportunity to get together with some other single mums and their kids and celebrate together. This year I have organised a Mother’s Day morning tea for my local single mums group. Last year we had a big lunch out. Go out and celebrate together!
4. Treat yourself to a present
If you have little ones, you may not get a gift. Why not treat yourself to a present? As single mothers, we rarely spend money on ourselves, and it’s not often we treat ourselves. So today is the perfect excuse to book yourself in for a massage or facial, or buy that winter jacket you’ve been eyeing off.
5. Start a new tradition
Unfortunately life has taken us on an alternative path than we predicted. We need to eventually move on, and accept that life is different now. A good way to put this into practice is to start a new tradition. Maybe that means going camping every Mother’s Day, or going out for brunch with the kids. Maybe you can go for a bike ride and have a picnic? Start a new tradition for your family unit and celebrate Mother’s Day in your very own way.
Remember, we are doing a great job, we are great mums, and to our children we are the whole world.
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